Sunday
Morning Bible Study
July 29,
2007
Introduction
Jacob has finally made it back into the land
of Canaan, the land promised to him
by God. He’s settled just outside the city of Shechem
and has purchased a piece of property.
:1-5 Dinah is raped
:1 Now Dinah the daughter of Leah, whom she had borne to Jacob, went out to
see the daughters of the land.
She’s the only girl in a family with 11 brothers (Benjamin hasn’t been born
yet). She needs some girlfriends. Some have suggested that Dinah may have been
14 or 15 at the time.
:2 And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw
her, he took her and lay with her, and violated her.
violated – ‘anah – (Piel)
to humble, mishandle, afflict
The word is usually translated
“afflicted”. This particular form of the word is used of the Egyptians
“afflicting” the Israelites as slaves (Ex. 1:12). It’s used to describe the
rape of Tamar by her half-brother Amnon (2Sam. 13:12).
Dinah was raped.
We aren’t told what Dinah’s part
was in this. We aren’t told whether she liked Shechem. We aren’t told if she
was learning to dress like the Canaanite girls. We aren’t told if she fluttered
her eyelashes at Shechem. We are simply told that Shechem crossed the line.
You need to be careful that you
don’t blame the other person for your sin. Shechem is the one on the hook for
this. It doesn’t matter what Dinah’s part was in this, he clearly crossed the
line.
You are responsible for your own
behavior.
Was there anything Jacob could have done to avoid this disaster?
I read a few commentaries that suggest that Jacob was to blame for living
too close to the city of Shechem. He
shouldn’t have let Dinah out of the house to meet the girls of Shechem.
Though I understand the heart behind those comments, there is a part of me that
has difficulty with it.
I’m not sure God wants Christians to completely withdraw from society.
Somehow we need to learn to be in the world, but not of it. I’m not sure I
totally understand where that balance is. I know we can get too close to the
world to where there is no difference between you and the unbeliever. But
somehow we need to still maintain contact with the world if we’re going to
reach this dying world with the gospel of Jesus Christ.
Part of me is a little reluctant to put blame on Jacob for this. I believe
the blame falls on Shechem, not Jacob.
Tragedies happen to good people. Good people are often the victims of evil
people.
It’s a little bit like the situation our nation is in with terrorists. It
seems that both political parties are looking for opportunities to blame each
other for the war on terror. But I wonder if we shouldn’t be blaming the
terrorists instead of each other.
:3 His soul was strongly attracted to Dinah the daughter of Jacob, and he
loved the young woman and spoke kindly to the young woman.
Notice the words
soul – nephesh
– soul, self, life, creature, person, appetite, mind, living being, desire,
emotion, passion
strongly attracted – dabaq – (Qal) to cling, cleave to; to stay with. It’s the word that’s
used of Adam’s marriage to Eve…
(Gen 2:24 NKJV) Therefore a man shall
leave his father and mother and be joined
to his wife…
Except Dinah isn’t his wife.
he loved – ‘ahab – to love; human love for another; to like
kindly – leb – inner man, mind, will, heart; it sounds like he was kind
of a romantic guy, saying sweet things to her.
With some situations of sexual
abuse, the abuser will turn to hate the person they’ve abused. That’s what will
happen when David’s daughter Tamar is raped by his son Amnon.
But here, Shechem is still
attracted to Dinah. He is still drawn to her.
:4 So Shechem spoke to his father Hamor, saying, "Get me this young
woman as a wife."
Marriage was typically done by arrangement. Shechem demands that his father
pay whatever dowry is required to get Dinah as his wife.
:5 And Jacob heard that he had defiled Dinah his daughter. Now his sons
were with his livestock in the field; so Jacob held his peace until they came.
The story seems to indicate (vs.26) that Dinah is being kept at Shechem’s
house during this time.
defiled – tame’ – (Piel) to defile; sexually; religiously; ceremonially; something
terrible has happened to Jacob’s little girl.
It’s possible that Jacob keeps his mouth shut because he’s outnumbered until
his sons get home. It’s possible he simply doesn’t know what to do and might be
guilty of inaction at a time that called for action.
Lesson
Canaanite love
Shechem was a Canaanite. And in a way we can’t blame him for what he is. What
I see here is a picture of what our world calls love. I’d call it “Canaanite
love”
1. It is physical
The first thing that caught his attention was how she looked.
Our world places way too much attention on the outer
physical shape of a person.
Madison Avenue knows this. Sex sells. Physically
attractive people catch our eye.
I don’t think it’s wrong to be physically attracted to
someone, but if that’s the measurement of the depth of the relationship, it’s
just a Canaanite thing.
God’s idea of marriage was to fix the problem “It is not good that man is
alone”.
Sex only satisfies a small part of man and woman’s
loneliness. There’s a whole lot of life outside of sex. There’s a whole lot of
life where you have the opportunity of having a companion to walk by your side.
Having breakfast at Polly’s. Taking a long drive together.
Talking about the difficulties of the day. Praying together. Making tough
decisions. Walking together on the pier at sunset. Holding hands as you stroll
through the mall.
I pity the person in a shallow relationship, where they
will walk through those times alone.
One thing is very clear in the best marriages I know. Husband
and wife are best friends.
2. It is selfish
He violated her. All he cared for was fulfilling his own sexual fantasy.
His initial thought was only for himself. The concept of “violation” is
that he didn’t think about her, only himself.
Do you hear Shechem ever asking Dinah what she wants?
When Abraham’s servant went to Syria
to find a bride for Isaac, the family asked Rebekah what she wanted to do. There
is no sign of this happening in the Canaanites.
You see the selfishness in
Shechem’s demands. He demands his father to acquire this girl for his bride.
3. It is only feelings
He did love her. He did speak kindly. If we saw this in a movie, we’d be
given the notion that it was okay that they weren’t married when they had sex.
Some people have this notion that “sex is special, save it for the one you
love”.
This is incorrect. Sex is special. But you should save it
for the one you marry, after you are married.
If I broke into the Toyota
dealership, stole a car, then after it has been in my garage for a week I decide
to buy it, does that change the fact that I am guilty of auto theft? The correct
order in things is to purchase the car, then take it home.
In marriage, the order is get married, then have sex.
Having feelings is a good thing, but by themselves feelings are not enough.
The right kind of love goes beyond emotions.
It is a love based on commitment. It is a love based on
choice, “I choose to love you” (not “I fell for you”). It is a choice to place
value on the other person.
Illustration
During a friendly argument, a husband asked his wife why
she married him in the first place. “I was just stupid,” she teased. When he
said he was happy to hear that, she requested an explanation. “People get
divorced all the time because they fall out of love,” he said. “But I’ve never
heard of anybody falling out of stupid.”
When you choose to love someone, you don’t accidentally
wake up one day and “fall out of love”. You have made a commitment to value the
other person.
When love is based on choice, I can choose to love you
even when things aren’t pleasant.
Wedding vows are “to have and to hold, from this day
forward; for better for worse, for richer and poorer,
in sickness
and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part”
I have a commitment to love you even when things are bad.
What does real love look like?
(1 Cor
13:4-7 NKJV) Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not
parade itself, is not puffed up; {5} does not behave rudely, does not seek its
own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; {6} does not rejoice in iniquity, but
rejoices in the truth; {7} bears all things, believes all things, hopes all
things, endures all things.
This is how we grow as people, learning to love like this.
Marriage is supposed to be one of those relationships that
grows and refines us. The commitment of marriage means that we can’t walk away
from each other when it’s tough and so we have to learn to work it out. If I
have this concept of being inseparably connected to another person, then
instead of trying to find a way out of the relationship, I learn to find a way
to survive and even thrive in the relationship.
Ideally this ought to be the way we love one another in
church. But the problem is often that we don’t have the commitment to each
other to stick it out in the tough times and so people leave churches and go
somewhere else.
:6-17 Negotiations for Dinah’s marriage
:6 Then Hamor the father of Shechem went out to Jacob to speak with him.
Shechem is also going to be a part of these negotiations.
:7 And the sons of Jacob came in from the field when they heard it; and the
men were grieved and very angry, because he had done a disgraceful thing in
Israel by lying with Jacob's daughter, a thing which ought not to be done.
Note: Jacob’s sons aren’t little
boys any more. They are called “men”.
disgraceful – n@balah
– senselessness, folly; of immorality, profane actions (related word to
“Nabal”, the fool)
Just what is it that “ought not to be done”? Two possibilities:
1. Dinah was raped. She was violated. A sexual relationship before
marriage.
2. Marrying a Canaanite – there was already a history of the family being
aware of how much the Canaanites were a problem.
Abraham had seen the influence that the people of Sodom
had had on his nephew Lot. When it came time to find a wife for Isaac,
Abraham made sure she wasn’t a Canaanite (Gen. 24:3)
Rebekah used the problem of Esau marrying Canaanite women to be the excuse of
sending Jacob to uncle Laban (Gen. 27:46; 28:6)
The Canaanites were an incredibly immoral people. They were bad news.
I’m not sure Dinah made a mistake by making friends with Canaanite
neighbors.
But it’s a different thing if she was forced to marry a Canaanite.
:8 But Hamor spoke with them, saying, "The soul of my son Shechem
longs for your daughter. Please give her to him as a wife.
longs for – chashaq
– (Qal) to love, be attached to, long for
:9 "And make marriages with us; give your daughters to us, and take
our daughters to yourselves.
:10 "So you shall dwell with us, and the land shall be before you.
Dwell and trade in it, and acquire possessions for yourselves in it."
:11 Then Shechem said to her father and her brothers, "Let me find
favor in your eyes, and whatever you say to me I will give.
:12 "Ask me ever so much dowry and gift, and I will give according to
what you say to me; but give me the young woman as a wife."
Illustration
Sharing Cookies
A woman was in between flights at an airport. She had about an hour and a
half wait and decided that she would spend the time looking over the newspaper.
She had a little twinge of hunger, so she dropped by the lounge and picked up a
small package of cookies and sat down at a table to look over her paper. While
she was reading, she began to detect a small rustling sound, almost like
cellophane being crinkled and torn. She looked over the top of the newsprint
and, to her amazement, a well-dressed man, sitting at the same table, a total stranger
to her, was opening her cookies and helping himself. Flabbergasted, she didn’t
want to make a scene, and so she just kept the paper up in front of her face
and reached around and deliberately took the package of cookies and slid them
toward her and took out one and began to eat it. About a minute passed and, to
her amazement, she heard more crinkling of the cellophane. She looked around
the paper and the man, not looking at her, was simply eating another of her
cookies. Before she could reach over (by now they were at the bottom of the
stack), he looked at the last cookie and broke it in two and with a frown slid
it across to her side. He finished his half cookie, picked up his briefcase,
and made his way down the terminal. She was fuming as she munched on her last
half of cookie. Then she heard the call for her flight and began to make her
way to the gate where she would get on the plane. She needed her ticket, and so
she opened her purse and, to her shock, she saw her package of unopened cookies
still in her purse. Somewhere in that same airport was a man still shaking his
head, wondering how this strange lady had the nerve to eat part of his cookies!
I imagine this must have been a bitter thing for the brothers to listen to
Shechem. It’s like me asking you if I can have some of your cookies after I’ve
already eaten them.
:13 But the sons of Jacob answered Shechem and Hamor his father, and spoke
deceitfully, because he had defiled Dinah their sister.
Remember that brother Laban had
negotiated with Abraham’s servant with the marriage of his sister Rebekah to
Isaac. Now Dinah’s brothers step in to negotiate this settlement regarding the
marriage of their sister.
deceitfully – mirmah – deceit, treachery; an interesting word to be used for
Jacob the heal-catcher’s family.
:14 And they said to them, "We cannot do this thing, to give our
sister to one who is uncircumcised, for that would be a reproach to us.
reproach – cherpah
– reproach, scorn; reproach (resting upon condition of shame, disgrace)
It’s too bad they don’t mention
that Dinah had been raped. They only focus on the intermarriage with the
uncircumcised.
:15 "But on this condition we will consent to you: If you will become
as we are, if every male of you is circumcised,
:16 "then we will give our daughters to you, and we will take your
daughters to us; and we will dwell with you, and we will become one people.
:17 "But if you will not heed us and be circumcised, then we will take
our daughter and be gone."
Did Jacob’s sons expect the men of Shechem to do this? Some suggest that
they figured this would be the end of the problem since nobody would agree to
be circumcised. Or perhaps they knew exactly what was up ahead.
Lesson
Abusive religion
It is a sad thing when people use religion to abuse people.
Circumcision intended to be a sign between God and Abraham’s family,
showing they would follow Him. It was a
symbol of cutting away the fleshly sin nature and living by the Spirit.
Jacob’s sons are going to use it to kill their enemies.
Other examples through history:
Muslim Imams promising young men a heaven filled with virgins if they blow
themselves up.
Illustration
After getting nailed by a Daisy Cutter, Osama made his way to the pearly
gates. There, he is greeted by George
Washington. “How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!” yells Mr. Washington,
slapping Osama in the face. Patrick Henry comes up from behind. “You wanted to
end the Americans’ liberty, so they gave you death!” Henry punches Osama on the
nose. James Madison comes up next and says, “This is why I allowed the Federal government
to provide for the common defense!” He delivers a kick to Osama’s knee. Osama
is subjected to similar beatings from John Randolph, James Monroe, and 65 other
people sharing the same love for liberty and America.
As he writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up and hurls him back
toward the gate where he is to be judged. As Osama awaits his journey to his
final very hot destination, he screams, “This is not what I was promised!” An
angel replies, “I told you there would be 70 Virginians waiting for you. What
did you think I said?”
The Christian church is not innocent of these kinds of things through
history. Catholic indulgences – raising
money to build glamorous structures in the Vatican
by telling people they needed to pay money to get their loved ones out of hell
or purgatory.
I’m not sure that the glamorous lifestyles of the TBN folks are much
different, motivating people to give to them through either greed (promising
they too will become wealthy) or guilt (our ministry is going to close it’s
doors if you don’t help us).
:18-24 The city is circumcised
:18 And their words pleased Hamor and Shechem, Hamor's son.
They’re kind of short sighted in
their thinking. It doesn’t seem to be too high of a price to pay to have
everyone circumcised.
:19 So the young man did not delay to do the thing, because he delighted in
Jacob's daughter. He was more honorable than all the household of his father.
delighted – chaphets
– to delight in, take pleasure in, desire, be pleased with
more honorable – kabad
– (Niphal) to be made heavy, be honored, to get oneself glory or honor,
gain glory
Considering that he raped Jacob’s daughter, if he’s the “more honorable” of
the family, I’d hate to see the others.
Yet this is going to be the reason why the men of the city are going to pay
attention to what Shechem is about to ask them.
:20 And Hamor and Shechem his son came to the gate of their city, and spoke
with the men of their city, saying:
the gate of their city – this is where the city marketplace would
be, this is where the leaders hung out and official things took place, sort of
like city hall.
:21 "These men are at peace with us. Therefore let them dwell in the
land and trade in it. For indeed the land is large enough for them. Let us take
their daughters to us as wives, and let us give them our daughters.
:22 "Only on this condition will the men consent to dwell with us, to
be one people: if every male among us is circumcised as they are circumcised.
:23 "Will not their livestock, their property, and every animal of
theirs be ours? Only let us consent to them, and they will dwell with us."
In other words: It will be
profitable to do this.
:24 And all who went out of the gate of his city heeded Hamor and Shechem
his son; every male was circumcised, all who went out of the gate of his city.
:25-31 The city wiped out
:25 Now it came to pass on the third day, when they were in pain, that two
of the sons of Jacob, Simeon and Levi, Dinah's brothers, each took his sword
and came boldly upon the city and killed all the males.
third day – the pain was at its worse on this day of the
healing process. The men of the city are incapacitated.
Dinah’s brothers – Simeon and Levi had the same mother as Dinah (Leah).
sword – chereb
– sword, knife
:26 And they killed Hamor and Shechem his son with the edge of the sword,
and took Dinah from Shechem's house, and went out.
:27 The sons of Jacob came upon the slain, and plundered the city, because
their sister had been defiled.
It seems that the rest of Jacob’s
sons joined in on the plundering of the city.
:28 They took their sheep, their oxen, and their donkeys, what was in the
city and what was in the field,
:29 and all their wealth. All their little ones and their wives they took
captive; and they plundered even all that was in the houses.
They killed all the men of the city and took the wives and children as
slaves.
:30 Then Jacob said to Simeon and Levi, "You have troubled me by
making me obnoxious among the inhabitants of the land, among the Canaanites and
the Perizzites; and since I am few in number, they will gather themselves
together against me and kill me. I shall be destroyed, my household and
I."
:31 But they said, "Should he treat our sister like a harlot?"
Some see Jacob as being overly concerned about himself in his
statement. But if you pay attention to
what he says, he’s talking about the whole family. He realizes that this act of revenge has made
things difficult for the entire family.
The sons respond with their rationalization. They felt justified in the
actions they took.
Lesson
The danger of anger
At the end of his life, Jacob will give us some commentary on this chapter:
(Gen 49:5-7 NKJV) "Simeon
and Levi are brothers; Instruments of cruelty are in their dwelling place. {6}
Let not my soul enter their council; Let not my honor be united to their
assembly; For in their anger they slew a man, And in their self-will they
hamstrung an ox. {7} Cursed be their anger, for it is fierce; And their wrath,
for it is cruel! I will divide them in Jacob And scatter them in Israel.
Simeon and Levi got into trouble because of their uncontrolled anger.
Can you see that Simeon and Levi went a little overboard in their
revenge? I could see them asking the
city to punish Shechem for raping their sister, but killing all the men of the
city? That is definitely “overkill”.
We might want to justify our anger at times like they did. They had reasons for being angry. Sometimes we can feel as if no one pays
attention to us unless we get angry.
The Bible says,
(James 1:19-20 NKJV) So
then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow
to wrath; {20} for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
Paul writes,
(Rom 12:19-21 NKJV) Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather
give place to wrath; for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will
repay," says the Lord. {20} Therefore "If your enemy is hungry, feed
him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of
fire on his head." {21} Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with
good.
We need to learn to put these things into God’s hands and
let Him take care of the “vengeance”.
Anger is rarely the right way to handle any problem.